Sun, sand and many wedding celebrations

A family gathering in The Gambia

Please forgive any typos or poorly sized images. Writing remotely on a temperamental Internet connection is challenging. Thanks for supporting my corner of the substàck world.

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The Clark family tradionally gathers at Christmas and for a barbeque in September. This Easter though a number of us are breaking with tradiion and gathering in The Gambia to celegrate the marriage of my husband's niece Jo to a wonderful Gambian man that we know as Ozzy.

We arrived early to enjoy a week’s holiday at the Coco Ocean Beach Resort. Our spacious room looked out on bamboo plants and palm trees. The sky is a perfect blue and bird song fills the air. It is a short walk to a beach of golden ssand and seashells galore. It is quite idyllic. I can see why The Gambia is a popular holiday destination for the British.

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Thursday began with a wedding rehearsal for Saturday's UK style ceremony to ensure those involved in the service knew where to stand, sit and in what order to process down the aisle. The location is a gazebo on the edge of the hotel lawn with the beach and ocean providing the backdrop.

Next a 20-minute taxi journey to the tailor who is making clothes in a bright blue shiny material for guests at Friday's Gambian celebration. Although I had been told my dress was ready to collect the tailor couldn't find it. New measurements were taken and he promised it would be delivered by the evening. I could only trust him on this and his assurance that it would fit.

The day was completed by a Jola dance celebration at the home of the groom's family. The Jola are a tribal group with a fascinating history throughout Gambia and Senegal. The women led the traditional style dancing to the accompaniment of drums and a saxophonist. There was excellent rice and chicken to eat, and frequent requests to shower the bride with cash. Both bride and groom were bedecked in beads. The bride's headdress was beautiful

Diving deep into diversity

The second day of celebration was also at the house of the bridegroom's family. Many of the wedding guests were dressed in the blue fabric that represented the family. I loved the creativity of the dress designs; every woman had personalised their dress in some way. My blue dress was still MIA despite numerous reports of its whereabouts. The tailor had, however, swiftly produced my dress design in the gorgeous colourful fabric of the bridesmaid dresses so I was declared an honorary bridesmaid for the day. I was secretly thrilled to have a dress that will be wearable back in the UK.

We were in for a diverse cultural experience. There were, of course, drums; this time played by a group of Hausa women. After a meal of rice and lamb a Hausa shaman arrived which triggered more dancing and showering the bride with cash. The shaman's costume resembled a black haystack and a monkey mask to my unrefined Western eyes. From what I could gather it is tradtional to invite one to weddings and funerals although the spiritual aspects are no longer dominant as most Gambians are either Muslim or Christian these days.

At 5pm the bride and her close female friends and relatives moved indoors while the men gathered together for the Islamic wedding ceremony. This focused heavily on the joining of the two families as one and mainly featured the groom and the bride's father. Towards the end I thought the guests were being handed small root vegetables, which was most strange. It was actually Kola nuts that have symbolically replaced the tradition of the groom paying a bride price or dowry to the bride's family. My brother-in-law was grateful to not become the owner of an appropriate number of goats!

The bride’s involvement in the ceremony was to agree to the marriage from her seat out of sight in the house. When it was complete her husband led her back into the gathering and we returned to the familiar territory of congratulatons and photographs. The bridal party then changed clothes for more photographs, more food and more dancing. As evening arrived the drums and PA kit moved into the street outside the house. Everyone from the neighbourhood was welcome to join the party.

Two celebrations successfully delivered. One more to go.

The Western white wedding

Together with my husband, I had the huge joy and privilege of officiating the Christian blessing of Ozzy and Jo's marriage. With the beach and ocean as a backdrop we led the bride and groom and around 100 guests through the familiar words of an English wedding service plus some unscripted prayers and short talks. I spoke briefly on communication in marriage and also finding new shared interests as the years roll on. Having been married for over 40 years my husband and I have developed a love of jazz and birdwatching and travel. Sometimes we get to combine all three on our adventures together.

After the ceremony we continued on familiar territory. Food. Beautiful speeches that had us all wiping away tears particularly when the groom spoke of his love for his bride. A first dance. Cutting of the cake. Disco dancing. It was a lovely day full of family love.

And so, after three days, many changes of clothes ((the bride had four wedding dresses), and much joy we feel they are well and truly married. Now to make the most of two more days in this wonderful country

And finally…

I don't have a book review this week as the past few days have been focused on family celebrations. However, I did have a dig through my poetry files.

I wrote this poem during the pandemic and it featured in an anthology called The Gift. This was a fundraising project by Open University alumni in support of the hard-pressed workers of the NHS in the UK.

Given the theme, I felt it was appropriate to share it on this Easter Sunday. As a person of faith I believe celebrating the hope and love of Jesus through his defeat of death is not just for Easter, however. May we all find hope and love in these challenging times.

A sonnet to true riches

If only I could hand rare gifts to you
that you might then exchange these worldly things.
Silver and gold, and jewels of great value
for love and peace, and all the joys of spring.

How sad my heart that fate has so decreed,
much wealth to some, while I am sorely poor.
Had I riches, I’d scatter it like seed
and lay all I have gladly at your door.

Truth is: gold buys nothing of real worth
but all’s not lost, for other gifts come free.
And so I choose a sacrificial path
Gifting to you what’s deeply hid in me.

I offer you this sweetest sacrifice
The gift of love for which there is no price.